Chuck Versus the Birthday Test
by Imagination-Parade
Summary: Sarah says all she wants for her birthday is a quiet day at home with Chuck.  She ends up with a birthday filled with surprises, boxing, candles, and a couple of guns.


_Hi everyone! So I don't really know where this came from. I guess it's a combination of me being in birthday mode (since mine was not too long ago,) Yvonne's quote about Sarah liking dates in Paris, Zac's old interview from Chelsea Lately, and finding out the Chuck producers cut a scene of Sarah beating Morgan at Duck Hunt from "Chuck Versus the Masquerade." Anyway…I think I'm pretty pleased with the results, so I hope it doesn't read too weird._

_As always, Chuck isn't mine, and please review!_

* * *

Morgan Grimes walked into the Buy More bright and early on a Monday morning. The store wouldn't be open for an hour, so, aside from the CIA's latest Greta, who seemed to always beat Morgan to the store in the morning, Morgan expected to be the only one there. He was surprised, then, to find his best friend sitting behind the Nerd Herd desk, absent-mindedly playing a very basic computer game.

"Chuck," Morgan called as he wandered over. "What are you doing up here, man?"

"I'm having a bit of a dilemma," Chuck said, keeping his eyes on the screen as he mindlessly clicked the mouse.

"Of the spy or the Sarah Walker variety?" Morgan asked.

"Sarah," Chuck sighed.

"Alright, talk it out," Morgan said, hopping onto the Nerd Herd desk.

"Sarah's birthday is on Friday," Chuck said. "I've got nothing."

"Nothing as in…?" Morgan started.

"_Nothing_," Chuck said.

Morgan sighed and shook his head. "Well, you're going to be a good husband, aren't you?" he teased. "Good luck, buddy."

"Hey!" Chuck protested, finally tearing his eyes away from the screen. "Give me a little credit. I could've forgotten, seeing as how our wedding is in three weeks, and we've had a lot on our plate, but I totally remembered. I just…I don't…you know, it's _her_ fault I've got nothing!"

"Why's that?" Morgan asked.

"She's impossible. She told me not to plan anything because she's not really a birthday person," Chuck said.

"Everyone says that and no one means it," Morgan said.

"Exactly!" Chuck agreed.

"But this is, what, Sarah's third or fourth birthday since she's been in your life? What'd you do for the other ones?" Morgan asked.

"I didn't learn her real birthday until we were actually a couple," Chuck said. "And she ended up on a mission last year, so we weren't even on the same continent."

"She wouldn't tell you her real birthday?" Morgan asked.

"No. Before we got together, I wanted to do something for her birthday, partially because I wanted to do something nice for her and partially to keep up with the whole cover couple illusion, and she fed me some crap about how she couldn't give me the real date because it would compromise _her_ cover, so she gave me three dates and told me to pick one," Chuck said with a laugh.

"Did you pick the right one?" Morgan asked.

"Her real birthday wasn't even one of my options," Chuck said. "She's a crafty one, that Agent Walker, and you know, I'm not looking to throw her some huge party because I know that's not really her, but I feel like I should do _something_…even if she tells me not to."

"Absolutely," Morgan agreed. "What if you end up on another mission, though?"

"That line of thinking just helps Sarah's don't-plan-anything argument," Chuck said. "Which, you know, I guess she's got a point since missions have so far led to a thwarted Valentine's Day, a villainous Thanksgiving guest, and multiple ruined proposal attempts."

"Yeah, you don't have a great track record with special occasions," Morgan agreed.

"No," Chuck sighed. "So what do I do? Buy her a cake and call it a day? This has got to be a trick, right…some sort of pre-wedding test to see how well I do planning something special for her on my own? Sarah doesn't really seem like the type to do that, but maybe it's a like a universal…girl thing?"

"I'll talk to her," Morgan offered.

"What?" Chuck asked, slightly amused.

"I'll find out what she really wants," he said.

"How do you plan on doing that?"

"Excuse me, Charles," Morgan said, adjusting his tie. "I am a CIA operative. I think I can get a little info out of a girl."

"_My _girl?" Chuck asked in disbelief. "The one who's trained to withstand actual torture to protect information? _That_ girl?"

"Hey, come on, I can talk to Sarah," Morgan said. "We're buddies."

"You are?" Chuck asked.

"Yeah, we're like _this_," Morgan said, crossing two of his fingers together. Chuck tried not to laugh. "I'll take care of it."

Morgan headed over to his old apartment on his lunch break to complete his self-assigned mission. When no one answered the front door, he let himself in through the Morgan door, grabbed a game controller, turned the computer screen on, and flopped onto Chuck's bed. Twenty minutes later, after he was deeply involved in a game, Sarah opened the bedroom door. Both let out a scream of surprise when they realized they were no longer alone.

"Morgan, why are you on my bed?" Sarah asked, glancing around the room for a clue as to what was going on.

"Uh, Sarah, what are you planning on doing with that knife?" Morgan asked, his eyes firmly fixed upon the small blade she had pulled from her back pocket of her jeans.

"Instinct," she shrugged, concealing the blade and placing it back in her pocket. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm on my lunch break, so I thought we could just…hang," he said weakly.

"Just the two of us? Really?" Sarah asked. "Not that that's bad, we just…don't normally do that."

"Well, yeah, but come on, a guy can't hang out with his soon-to-be best-friend-in-law?" Morgan laughed.

Sarah shot him a look and sat down in Chuck's computer chair. They stared each other down for a few moments before she leaned forward and sweetly asked, "What do you want, Morgan?"

"Nothing," Morgan said, glancing at the ceiling. "Just to…you know…"

"Hang," Sarah finished.

"Right," Morgan said. "So, hey, I hear you have a birthday coming up soon."

"Oh," Sarah said with a satisfied grin, leaning back in her chair. "Chuck sent you."

"No. What? No," Morgan stuttered. Sarah shot him another disbelieving look. "Okay, fine. I'm here to find out what you really want for your birthday because Chuck is at a loss."

"I told him not to plan anything," Sarah said.

"And you expected him to accept that without question?" Morgan asked.

"I guess not," Sarah sighed. "I guess I'm just not a big birthday…hoopla…kind of person."

"Everyone says that and no one means it," Morgan said, echoing his earlier words.

"Well, Morgan, I kind of do," Sarah said. "I mean, I don't want it to go completely unacknowledged, but I haven't had a quiet birthday at home since I was little. I've always been either helping my dad with a con or on a mission somewhere, so if I get lucky enough to get a day off this year, I really just want to stay here with Chuck and…do nothing."

Sarah was smiling at the thought of having no obligations and nothing to do, so Morgan nodded and said, "I guess that makes sense."

"So you can tell Chuck that this isn't some girl trick or anything like that. All he has to do is kiss me and wish me a happy birthday, and I'll be happy," Sarah said. "_Really_."

"He should get a cake, though, right?" Morgan asked.

"Cake is good," Sarah agreed. "Now please get off my bed."

"Oh yeah, sure thing," Morgan said, scrambling off the mattress. He climbed out the Morgan door and called, "Good talk, Sarah!" as he left.

When Morgan arrived back at the Buy More, he found Chuck still behind the Nerd Herd desk, but this time, instead of aimlessly moping, he was busily typing on a computer. He glanced up briefly as he pulled himself down the desk to grab a piece of paper and noticed the new arrival.

"Morgan!" Chuck called as Morgan approached. "I got it!"

"You got what?" Morgan asked.

"Sarah's birthday," Chuck said. "Paris!"

"Chuck," Morgan started.

"No, it's perfect. We're getting married in a couple weeks, right? So I'll book the same room where we first…_you know_ after I saved her life, and we'll have this whole pre-wedding romantic weekend."

"That's not what she wants, man," Morgan said.

Chuck finally looked up from the computer, a look of surprise on his face.

"You actually got her to talk? What'd she say?" Chuck asked.

"That, unless you got called out on a mission, she wants a nice, quiet birthday at home with you," Morgan said.

"Well, that's what she told me," Chuck said. "Sarah loves Paris, and since we elected to go somewhere tropical for the honeymoon…"

"Chuck, you're getting off easy here, man," Morgan said. "Kisses and cake…that's all she wants. Be glad you have a low-maintenance girl and go with it!"

"Can it really be that easy?" Chuck asked.

"You are marrying a mysterious woman, my friend," Morgan said.

"Yeah, tell me about it," Chuck scoffed. He paused for a minute, glancing between Morgan and the work he was doing on the computer. He made a decision and finally closed all of the Paris things on his computer screen. "But…okay, quiet birthday at home…I think I can manage that."

* * *

On Friday evening, Sarah returned home after a long day of paperwork at Castle. Having already been woken up with breakfast in bed, she wasn't expecting much in terms of birthday surprises. Nevertheless, she opened the front door to find a table full of candles and a vase full of Casablanca lilies. A 'Happy Birthday' banner hung across the window into the kitchen, and Chuck appeared at the end of the hallway once he heard the door open and shut.

"What is this?" Sarah asked with a smile.

"Part Two of Sarah Walker's birthday celebration," Chuck smiled.

"You made dinner, too?" Sarah asked. "Breakfast was more than enough."

"Well, uh…" Chuck said with a nervous laugh as he headed towards the kitchen. "Not exactly…don't praise me too much yet."

He sheepishly held up two to-go bags from their favorite hamburger place. Sarah giggled. He hung his hands, still holding the bags, by his sides.

"I actually had to do my old Nerd Herd-ing job today," Chuck said in an attempt to defend himself. Sarah titled her head and jutted out her bottom lip is a show of mock sympathy. "But I got your favorite – extra pickles. This is okay, right?"

"This is great, Chuck. Thank you," Sarah said, walking over and pecking his lips.

She grabbed the bags and headed to the table while Chuck walked in to the kitchen. He opened the fridge.

"Normally, I'd get you some sort of exquisite red wine or champagne, but since that doesn't really do with tonight's cuisine…" he said, pulling out two glass bottles. "Orange or grape?"

Sarah grinned again and reached for the soda. "Orange."

Chuck popped the top off of both bottles, handed her the orange one, and sat down with her. She went to take a sip from hers, but stopped when she noticed he was holding his bottle up for a toast.

"To my beautiful Sarah on her birthday…I really love you, honey," he said.

Sarah cutely shrugged and replied, "I really love you, too."

They leaned together for another brief kiss before Chuck tapped their glasses together and whispered, "Cheers."

After a few minutes of eating, Chuck asked, "So what'd you do all day?"

"Mission reports," Sarah sighed. "_Lots_ of mission reports."

"That was my mission, too. You should've called me," Chuck said. "I could've helped."

"Your mission reports are often…erratic," Sarah said. "Beckman prefers that I do them."

"Yeah, you're right," Chuck sighed.

"You fixed computers all day?" Sarah asked.

"Yeah, which, I mean…it's fine. I'm still good at it," he said. "It's just hard to be Chuck the lowly Nerd Herder after three days of being _Agent Bartowski_, you know?"

"I know," Sarah nodded.

"Really because you had _no_ sympathy for me seven minutes ago," Chuck said.

"Well, no," Sarah said. "I worked at that _stupid_ hot dog place for cover."

"Right…hey, do you still have that outfit because we could…" Chuck said, a mischievous glint in his eye.

"_No_," Sarah interrupted.

"Alright, okay, don't blame a guy for trying!" Chuck said.

After presenting Sarah with her cake, one that Chuck had had made with her favorite picture of them printed on it, he steered her towards the living room. Chuck sat her down on the couch and dropped a wrapped box in her lap.

"Present time," Chuck said.

"Didn't you already give me my gift?" Sarah asked, fingering the new necklace she had woken up wearing that morning.

"This one has an expiration date," Chuck said. "Open it."

Sarah unwrapped the gift, lifting a plastic gun from the box. She looked it over for a second before stating, "Uh, sweetie…I know I've been saying I need a new gun lately, but I don't think this will help me stop the bad guys."

Chuck grabbed the gun and plugged it into his video game console before handing it back to her. "It's for the games, Sarah."

"You're going to let me play?" she asked with excitement. "You're lifting the ban?"

"_No_!" Chuck replied in an exaggerated voice. "Just for today."

Shortly after Chuck and Morgan started inviting their girlfriends to the occasional Monday night game night, they had instituted a strict no-shooting-games policy on Sarah after she effortlessly beat everyone three girlfriend-friendly-Mondays in a row. Sarah wasn't big on video games in general, but even she could get into some of the shooting-based ones. Chuck picked up the second gun and sighed.

"Let's get this over with," he said, knowing she was going to kick his butt.

"Well, you're going to at least _try_, right?" she asked, settling into her shooting stance on the couch. "It's not fun if you don't even try."

"Yeah, yeah…just press play," he said, having given her the dominant controller.

By the end of the first round, Sarah had 107 kills, while Chuck had only 23. He didn't fare much better in the second round.

"You look so _serious_ when you're doing that," Chuck commented as Sarah made her last kill in the second round.

"Maybe you and Morgan would be better at it if you took it more seriously," Sarah said.

"Maybe Morgan and I would be better at it if we had sniper training," Chuck mumbled.

"Well, that's why we haven't ever let Casey play," Sarah said.

"Sometimes, on game nights, I really wish you would just sit there and root for me instead of trying to beat us."

"Like be your cheerleader?" Sarah asked.

"Exactly," Chuck smiled.

"Well, why can't I do both?" Sarah pressed the start button on Round 3, winked at Chuck as the game loaded, and said, in a sultry voice, "Go _get 'em_, honey."

After two more rounds of Sarah kicking his ass, Chuck pulled the gun from her hand and replaced it with a nunchuck controller. Sarah's mouth dropped open in protest.

"Give me the gun back," she said.

"No, we're done," Chuck said.

"You said I had all of today."

"I lied," he said, powering up the boxing game. "But I watched you get just as much satisfaction out of beating Morgan at this last week, so let's switch to this for a while."

"You don't like fighting girls, remember?" Sarah teased as she stood up and they chose their characters.

"I will break your cartoon's face, woman," Chuck replied with a grin as the game began.

Sarah took the fighting game just as seriously as she took the shooting one. She settled into her instinctive combat preparation stance and started punching as soon as the game allowed. Chuck let her get a few hits in before he flashed and knocked her character down with just a few perfectly-executed boxing moves. Sarah's mouth dropped open again as she immediately paused the game and threw the controller onto the couch.

"What was that?" she asked accusingly.

"Looks like you lost, honey," Chuck grinned.

"Did you just _flash_?"

"No," Chuck replied, a guilty grin on his face.

"Chuck Bartowski, I have been around as long as you've been flashing," Sarah said. "I think I can recognize a flash when I see it."

"So what if I did?" he teased.

"I cannot believe you use the _Intersect_ to win video games, and you think _I_ cheat by simply choosing games that play to my strengths!"

"Well, to be fair, I've never had to use the Intersect to beat Morgan at this," Chuck said. "The two times he won were purely by accident."

Sarah sighed in realization and said, "I'm too competitive for video games, aren't I?"

"Maybe a little," he said, turning the game system off. He gently held her hand and started pulling her down the hallway.

"Where are we going?" she asked.

"Phase Three of Sarah Walker's quiet, relaxing birthday at home," he said. "And hey, you know, you'll get better at the whole game night cheerleader thing. You can even pick your favorite color and we'll get you pom-poms and a little outfit. You know, maybe one that says 'Go Chuck!' on the front."

Chuck had a wicked grin on his face by the time he finished his cheerleader fantasy, and Sarah tried not to look too amused before playfully punching him in the arm.

"Wh…hey! I'm fair," Chuck said in defense, rubbing his arm. "We'd get a Morgan version for Alex, too."

"You're terrible," Sarah said as he pulled her into their bathroom. They turned to face each other, and Chuck slid his hands against either side of her waist. "And what is it with you and little outfits tonight?"

"I don't know," Chuck laughed, dropping a brief but passionate kiss to her lips. He dropped his voice to a whisper and kept his face close to hers as she said, "But let's get you out of this one."

She grinned, placed her hands on either side of his face, and kissed him again. After a few kisses, she pulled away, muttered, "Okay," and shut the bathroom door.

Sarah moaned as Chuck's lips began suckling on her neck. They were sitting in a bathtub full of warm water, the room dark except for the row of candles on the bathroom counter across from them. Chuck sat behind her, massaging her shoulders, his legs bent and resting on either side of her, while Sarah leaned against his chest, her eyes closed. Her cheeks pink from the heat of the water, Sarah had piled her hair high on top of her head to keep it dry, and she slowly began caressing Chuck's thighs with just the tips of her fingers as he gave her a massage and kissed her exposed neck. Her head instinctively tilted to give him more access to her skin.

"Feeling good?" Chuck asked in a mumble. Sarah moaned in response, and he chuckled before placing another sucking kiss on her neck.

"Hey, Chuck?" she said, finally opening her eyes to look at him.

"Yeah," he muttered, peppering light kisses up the center of the back of her neck.

"Oh my god," she sighed, leaning into him.

"You were saying…" he grinned, repeating the move.

"I don't think I can talk to you if you're going to keep doing that."

He chuckled lightly and stopped kissing her. "But I'm only stopping because I want to know what you were going to say."

"I just wanted to thank you for keeping today pretty low-key," she said. "I have to admit, I was worried you were going to try and whisk me off to France or something."

Chuck stopped rubbing her shoulders and dropped his hands to her waist. Sarah turned and shot him a suspicious grin.

"Paris…was my…original plan," he admitted.

"I knew it," she laughed.

"In a way, it's where we fell in love," Chuck said. "I thought a romantic, almost-married getaway might be nice."

"Maybe," Sarah shrugged. "But I fell in love in Burbank."

Chuck placed a small, affectionate kiss on her shoulder and said, "Me too."

"Anyway, this was basically just what I wanted, so…thank you," she said.

"You're welcome," Chuck said, kissing her shoulder again. "Happy Birthday."

* * *

_Thanks for reading! Don't forget to review :)_


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